One Week Left For The Planet

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4 Responses to One Week Left For The Planet

  1. Gator says:

    Oh thank God! Now I can truly ignore any New Years resolutions. What a relief…

  2. Ver Auger says:

    Greta Passes Greenhouse Gasses

    Greta bent forward and lit a match,
    Held the flame between her buns.
    And lit each blast of gas she passed,
    Like a battery of Gatling guns.

    “Do you always light your farts?” I asked,
    “Does it cause you burns or pain?”
    She sneered at me quite nastily
    And asked, “Do I look insane?”

    “Well, actually,” I began to say
    That she really did seem nuts.
    But I caught my breath when the stench of death
    Came from deep within her guts.

    She said, “It seems my vegan diet
    Offends your sense of smell.
    But you must also eat like me
    Or go to greenhouse Hell.”

    “Our farts explode primarily
    Because of methane gas,
    The quantity of which defines
    The ‘footprint’ of one’s ass.”

    “Methane’s greenhouse gas effect
    Exceeds mere CO2,
    By over twenty, which isn’t funny
    From a climate point of view,”

    “You must digest this fact,” said she,
    And meditate on it.
    I said, “The polar bears agree
    That you are full of shit!”

    “The climate isn’t worrisome,
    No threatening extremes.
    You younger folks fell for a hoax
    And false alarmist memes.”

    “You’re looking pale, go eat a steak,
    And then review the studies
    In Tony Heller’s videos,
    With your alarmist buddies.”

  3. Sharpshooter says:

    Figerueres…the same twat that admitted the whole purpose was to implement world socialism?

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