My St Francis Epiphany

Supposedly St. Francis of Assisi had a terrible illness, and emerged with a vision to end his life of debauchery, and take care of lepers.

Similarly, I have been suffering from the flu from hell for the past week and have had an epiphany to stop global warming. Here is my prayer to Gaia

Gaia, chief bitch of the universe

Help me to end imaginary global warming, imaginary acceleration in ice loss, imaginary acceleration in sea level rise, imaginary increases in heat waves, imaginary increases in extreme weather, imaginary increases in drought, and most importantly – tell big tobacco to pay up or else

And grant me the serenity to accept the fact that our government is a bunch of idiots and crooks.


– PS tell big oil to pay up too

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6 Responses to My St Francis Epiphany

  1. JRo says:

    If you correlated the drop in temperature from daytime high to nighttime low with relative humidity and length of day, couldn’t any change in correlation over time be attributed to changes in greenhouse gasses other than H2O?

  2. Peta says:

    You still have a fever.

    Only someone with a fever would call upon Al Gore’s alter ego.

    Take two aspirins and call somebody else in the morning.

  3. theyouk says:

    Speedy recovery to you. There have been a lot of nasty bugs making the rounds of late–probably unprecedented in the whole history of the universe. It absolutely must be due to elevated CO2 levels, or new pathogens exposed by receding glaciers, or pathogens freed from melting antarctic/arctic ice, or melting permafrost, or polar bear flatulence. Yes, it’s probably the bears… (sarc–except for the speedy recover part; I wish you good health!)

  4. kingbum says:

    This is pure gold, coffee came out my nose as I read this. Keep up the good fight

  5. Louis Hooffstetter says:

    The Pope is NOT amused.

    No indulgences for you!

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