The Affordable Golf Act

No Golfer Left behind

When elected president, my first priority will be to address the skyrocketing cost of golf in  America. Golf is a fundamental human right, which has been denied to too many for too long.

Under my plan, if you like your golf pro, you can keep your golf pro. If you like your golf course, you can keep your golf course. Pre-existing handicaps will not be changed or affected by this. The average American family will save up to $2,500 per year under my plan.

All greens fees will be paid through a single payer plan, with funding coming directly out of George Soros’ offshore bank accounts. All poorly played shots can be blamed on climate change, all rounds are guaranteed to be sub-par, and of course – unlimited golf at the Greenland Country Club.

Remember to vote for Toto.

About Tony Heller

Just having fun
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